My thorn in the Flesh #1

So there’s this request I have that God won’t grant me (yet), well He hasn’t for the past two and half years. Instead of grouching I need to know why because I have come to know in the long run if I don’t stop to take the lessons I will be making the same prayer month after month, every single year. #me tryna figure God out, again.

I remember in boarding high school soaking clothes on a weekend and washing them the next. By the time I woke up on a Saturday morning, the girl next to me would be arranging her ironed clothes ready for a new week. I had laundry, tons of assignments and this left no room for studying. There’s a thin line between procrastinating & laziness and I have bordered on the banks endlessly. I certainly didn’t plaster these walls, now am building them all over again, and it’s hard.

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I never Knew you!

‘I am the true vine, and my father is the gardener. He cuts of every branch in me that bears no fruit while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.’

Christian journey can be lonely. Jesus had quite a number of those moments: he may have been heaven sick from time to time, spending days in the wilderness as opposed to streets of gold (the limitation of my human thoughts). This walk entails many sacrifices not to mention the ‘pruning’ we go through. The text above says pruning takes place to give room for growth. Sometimes we are forced to forsake entertainment that doesn’t glorify God, friends & relationships that constantly draw us away from God. Other times we fall so hard & low to get a clear perspective of the wrong turn we took. This is how we are encouraged:

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Spiritual vs Emotional worship

Weakening the body, strengthening the spirit.

Lessons from 2 womb buddies..

John the Baptist and Jesus Christ.

When Elizabeth heard Mary’s greeting (Mary who was pregnant with Jesus), the baby leaped in her womb and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. Luke 1:41

John was born to prepare the way for Christ. He preached the gospel and baptised with water. He denied being Christ saying someone far much greater than him was to come. As he was preaching (fearlessly & unashamed as we ought to) he pointed out that Herodias was on the wrong marrying his own brother’s wife. He was arrested for this. In his jail he continuously heard that Jesus was performing miracles. “And am still here in jail?” perhaps he thought. So he sent his disciples to ask Jesus “are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else”?

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The truth about sexual sin


Roots of sexual sin.

‘But each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full grown, gives birth to death‘. James 1:14-15

Each one: all of us. None is exempted.

Tempted: tried or attracted, inclined to do something

His own: stemming from within

Evil desire: selfishness, wickedness, worldliness, ungodliness. Anything outside God’s will

Dragged away: drawn from the word of God

Enticed: seduced or lured into sin.

Conception: where evil desire meets fertile ground/suitable environment (lack of God’s word)

Gives birth: brings forth/delivers

Sin: actual sinful deed-immorality…

Full grown: when sin matures-when the sin becomes our life style

Death: irreversible outcome-physical/eternal death, divorce, disease..

What’s within us: if its within us, we had to have allowed it in. I will focus on sexual sin since sex sells on every platform, its well disguised and brings so much damage with it. The obvious setback with technology is that sexual material is available as discrete and cheap as possible. It’s disguised in viral videos like mollis (for the Kenyan audience) and reality shows/movies/series that show partial or total nudity and filthy language. It’s packaged in shades of grey so we watch for entertainment as our brains pick up the selling points-nudity/sexual content. We make fun about the extremes enticed by the devil’s humor while he’s got the last laugh. Circumstances of love & need for it arise within us; our thoughts are captured in the normalcy of sex before marriage, adultery, masturbation and homosexuality. We justify them with everything but the word of God because its not within us in the first place. In its place is worldliness; where only our eyes can see through education, human rights and entertainment.

Dragged away and enticed: we get busy with life outside Christ (for christians) and we are barely at the feet of Jesus;reading His word, having fellowship, studying,meditating, sharing and acting as we are instructed. We are enticed by bills, relationships, promotions and goals we forget the world and all in it is but a road we are on. When Christians stumble, they fall hard. It’s the only opportunity the devil has to punish your decision to follow Christ and he sees to it that you do not rise again. He feeds us lies of continuous guilt and shame and we are stuck in bondage for ages. Careers, education, relationships, goals are not evil desires unless they obstruct our relationship with God.

Conception: mentioned above where lack of the word of God is a suitable environment to pick on the evil desire within us. When this two merge, sin is born. Evil desires stem from our thoughts where we have stored everything we know. After watching provocative material nothing holy will come out of it but thoughts that reinforce its effect, then actions to build on the results and a continued search of whatever one feels they are missing. Sin does not let you settle.

Death: If sin is not discontinued and repented it results to death in form of addictions – drugs & alcohol, disease (HIV), years and years of loss and for some its physical death. If they died in sin its an eternal loss that when put in words it loses meaning. Many homes are broken because of immorality, choices people make not because they don’t know better but are compelled by what they know (worldliness) or better lack of truth which can only be found in Jesus Christ.

Sin is enticing, short lived with a painful end. Its not worth the price. Do not be deceived by its package and rewards. It’s there to get you and your choice starts now.



# Do you know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior? If not say this prayer with me:

‘Lord Jesus,

I repent of my sins

Come into my life

And be my Lord and Savior’

Find a true church nearby that will walk with you through this journey.


“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” 1 John 1:9.

I recommend Ernest Wamboye’s ‘Lust & the City’ guide on sexual purity. I have personally not had this topic addressed any better than how this author and speaker does. Find his blog


Hidden truths bred in darkness.

Where there’s no light (truth), there’s darkness (death).

‘But each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full grown, gives birth to death‘.
James 1:14-15

This evil desire is anything outside the will of God. The ones that cause us to suppress the still small voice. The ones we respond to “it’s not hurting anyone”. Truth is it does, & the first person its hurting is you.

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What i learned in Sales

I have been really good at my job. Great highs (World Bank funded project) and just as many lows which I have come to appreciate much later. I used certain lines to my then boss to get my first job ‘you will not regret it’ and speaking for him am sure he didn’t. First am privileged to have worked with the smartest & most amazing people. A short tribute: Continue reading “What i learned in Sales”

Fighting Through

A wave of cold jolts her from sleep. She had passed out on the couch. Again. The throbbing headache and rumbling stomach blurs her vision. She had forgotten to take her meds. Heading to the kitchen, she stumbles over her heels and falls. “God please give me a break”. As she flips the eggs over she remembers the invoice her client had requested. She urgently needs an assistant because work is overwhelming. House projects are great, she prefers to do everything by herself because of the distraction but if she’s going to be in proper business she has to lose some control and get someone else to collect the checks, pay taxes, file reports, clean and make coffee.

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